What these innocent minds have to go through and do we have the time at all to observe and identify this?
This blog of mine is inspired by the happenings at home recently.
Couple of months ago the comment that featured in my daughter’s school dairy –was “she was unsettled and seems upset”. This continued for the next days too. That Friday I got a call from the school stating “she has been unsettled for the last one week. She is upset about some thing and is refusing to talk it out. Generally she is a very happy child, but unusually she has been secluding her self from the other kids, sits in a corner and sniffs / cries to self”. The school was curious to know of any change at home or anything happened @ home. I answered in the negative and then they told me to observe my daughter over the weekend and let them know if I find anything out of the blue.
This incident shook me up. That weekend we took all extra effort to make her happy and observe her. (It was indeed a tough thing to do from a mother’s POV – to observe her own child) But we could not find anything. Then the next week, she was pretty normal in school. Later on we kind of understood that she was upset because some kid bit her in school.(as that was the only period that she used to cry to go to school)
Similar thing happened last week @home. I was running around managing / doing activities / chores. My daughter must have observed my face being a bit agitated / tensed. She came to me and said – “Mommy sit here”. I sat, and then she said “Amma u ok, amma u ok?” With tears rolling down my eyes I realized my folly. That was when I became more conscious of the functioning of a child’s mind.
It made me really understand how this Absorbent Mind as described my Maria Montessori works. Many people believe that the most important period of life is the age of university studies, but actually not the period from birth to the age of six is the most important phase of life. For that is the time when man's intelligence itself, his greatest implement, is being formed. But not only aptitude; complete personality is formed then.
The absorbent mind is divided into two phases. The first phase is from birth to 3 years old and the second 3 – 6 years. In the first phase the young child
unknowingly or unconsciously acquires his basic abilities. The objective of the child during this period is to become independent from the adult for all his basic requirements. The child learns to speak, to walk, to gain control of his hands and to master his bodily functions. Apart from the physical developments during this phase, the child’s mind which is like a sponge looks out for all the information that it can absorb and this is the most important aspect of human life. This absorbency function of the mind does not happen to this extent anywhere later in life. This also explains why my daughter asked / is asking me circumstantial relevant questions as if she was watching me keenly.
With this extra sensitive pair of eyes and mind watching us always – what should we as parents do? Should we act as though nothing affects us – NO!!! We have all the freedom to express what ever can be publicly expressed in front of the child – but we need to treat the child as an adult in the environment and explain to the child why mommy or daddy is upset and there is really nothing to worry about. The child needs that extra assurance from a reliable source – the parents – that everything is fine. At the end of the day – it is an Innocent, soft mind and the responsibility of helping it turn to a healthy good mind is in our hands.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Tuesday, August 17, 2010
After a long time...Things have changed and so have my interests
It’s been almost 2.5 years that I wrote last. I have been thinking for long that I need to write, but the desire failed to take shape. Today finally, I mustered all my interest and said "If not today then Never". I think most of life's situations are like that. We need to decide and move ahead with it.
This blog may not be coherent in its flow of thoughts, but what am planning to write is about the children of today. When we were young, we used to go to school, be loaded with books and home work, play with neighbors back from school, have dinner & go to bed. We used to wait for one "Chitrahaar" / "Chitramaala"/ "Sunday afternoon or evening movie" / "Oliyum Oliyum", etc. I remember well - we had to get special permission from my dad for watching the weekend movie when we had exams. (As the TV wire would have been cut off). During holidays, we used to go to our grand mother's place or aunt's place and that's it.
Today, education system is no longer linear. There are so many options for the parent to choose - Open School, Traditional Method of education, Montessori,etc. More the option, more the confusion. As a parent, I encountered this couple of years back (as early as my daughter was born). The situation was similar to LASIK surgery; there were only apprehensions of what would happen in the future without any solid proof / case study.
It’s not only parents but the children of today are loaded with so much of information in the school, environment that the pressure to win the race is there in them from the very start. Today the topics of discussion in schools range from “How was your weekend”, “Where did you go for the weekend”, “ Which movie did you see”, “ Which restaurant did you go”, “ Blur Café in Sathyam is good”, “Which Country are you going this year for your vacation”, etc. Am sure, I did not discuss any of these till my college days and trust me I did not know where Blur Café was till couple of weeks back. (Though am a native of Chennai). Imagine the amount of pressure (peer) that these kids are put through by the schools, parents, society and thanks to proliferation of media. I feel bad for them on one hand for the pressure imposed on them and on the other hand that they are not enjoying life as we used to and they are in a venture to build their Brand Image. The taste of pepsi cola @ 50ps, sweet candy @ 25ps, Arisi mittai, Ice Cream that was brought by the street hawker, Soan papdi on the beach still lingers on my mouth. Added to these were curd rice and maavadu that used to be fed by our grand mother / aunt / mom for all of us (all cousins), Vadams, Imli from the trees, pampering by grand parents, etc...Served as the topping of the cake. Today these kids do not get any of these.
As I am writing this blog, there are numerous thoughts flashing in my mind – some answered some unanswered. A single post is not enough to share all of them. I need to keep writing to share those thoughts frequently. Going back to the statement I made when I started this post, “If not Today then Never” – I decided, let me at least think, write about these young adults and do something for their good. At the end of the day we need to “ENJOY LIFE”
This blog may not be coherent in its flow of thoughts, but what am planning to write is about the children of today. When we were young, we used to go to school, be loaded with books and home work, play with neighbors back from school, have dinner & go to bed. We used to wait for one "Chitrahaar" / "Chitramaala"/ "Sunday afternoon or evening movie" / "Oliyum Oliyum", etc. I remember well - we had to get special permission from my dad for watching the weekend movie when we had exams. (As the TV wire would have been cut off). During holidays, we used to go to our grand mother's place or aunt's place and that's it.
Today, education system is no longer linear. There are so many options for the parent to choose - Open School, Traditional Method of education, Montessori,etc. More the option, more the confusion. As a parent, I encountered this couple of years back (as early as my daughter was born). The situation was similar to LASIK surgery; there were only apprehensions of what would happen in the future without any solid proof / case study.
It’s not only parents but the children of today are loaded with so much of information in the school, environment that the pressure to win the race is there in them from the very start. Today the topics of discussion in schools range from “How was your weekend”, “Where did you go for the weekend”, “ Which movie did you see”, “ Which restaurant did you go”, “ Blur Café in Sathyam is good”, “Which Country are you going this year for your vacation”, etc. Am sure, I did not discuss any of these till my college days and trust me I did not know where Blur Café was till couple of weeks back. (Though am a native of Chennai). Imagine the amount of pressure (peer) that these kids are put through by the schools, parents, society and thanks to proliferation of media. I feel bad for them on one hand for the pressure imposed on them and on the other hand that they are not enjoying life as we used to and they are in a venture to build their Brand Image. The taste of pepsi cola @ 50ps, sweet candy @ 25ps, Arisi mittai, Ice Cream that was brought by the street hawker, Soan papdi on the beach still lingers on my mouth. Added to these were curd rice and maavadu that used to be fed by our grand mother / aunt / mom for all of us (all cousins), Vadams, Imli from the trees, pampering by grand parents, etc...Served as the topping of the cake. Today these kids do not get any of these.
As I am writing this blog, there are numerous thoughts flashing in my mind – some answered some unanswered. A single post is not enough to share all of them. I need to keep writing to share those thoughts frequently. Going back to the statement I made when I started this post, “If not Today then Never” – I decided, let me at least think, write about these young adults and do something for their good. At the end of the day we need to “ENJOY LIFE”
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